I have noticed recently an alarming reality in my life. It is a pattern that may well spread to other people, though I haven't spent time doing any searching. The fact is that all of my bad personality traits are built upon a foundation of my good traits. Confused? Well this is what I have noticed. My personality and skill set would tend towards the following characteristics.
- Methodical
- Even tempered
- Unaffected by negativity around me or towards me
- Detail focused and driven
- Somewhat intelligent
- Confident
- Cautious
- Etc.
Most of those things are beneficial and helpful for my life and I have structured the shape of my future plans around using those skills to glorify God. However, the struggles with sin and my bad traits come from an extension of all of those good traits. I could be termed insensitive, arrogant, condescending, unfriendly, not interested in other people, unloving, etc. I find that I have to work every day to temper and overcome the sinful desires to "be myself." I seek my own pleasure and that usually means fulfilling my own personality towards my own comfort. I have just now realized (far too late) that I must be conscious of who I am, so I can consciously act properly in a tempered way. Why can I not naturally be in perfect balance? Why can't my good traits end where they turn bad without my daily focus? Maybe in another 30 years or more, I will get it all worked out.
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